I hear it all the time from men: "I just want to meet that one
special woman." Usually when I hear this, I know they're headed
for trouble because they think if they meet "the one" their life is
going to somehow be complete.
What usually happens is, after a few months, she turns out to notbe all that special, and things get bad, really fast.
The last thing you ever want to do is link your life's fulfillment
to someone else. You want a woman who complements you, not
"completes" you. You are the only one who can "complete" you.
That, however, is no argument against meeting one woman for a
lifetime committed relationship. That's a fine thing, under the
right circumstances.
Most men, in view, have no idea what the right circumstances are
because they have little experience with women, good or bad. They
meet one, feel great, then believe the social conditioning that
says great feeling=committed for life relationship.
The divorce lawyers, obviously, love that kind of social
conditioning.
If, however, you make it you business to spend time with many women
(as friends, lovers, associates) then you begin to get a clearer
picture. You stop making decisions based on feelings (because you
experience where those lead) and start making decisions based on
reality.
You become comfortable around women, understanding why they do the
things they do, and learning how to deal with them in a way that's
no big deal to either of you.
You make yourself an attractive man to many women, making yourself
a more attractive man to just one. You know you can find another,
if things don't work out.
So, make it your business to associate with many women. In the
end, that will bring you to the one you really want, with theknowledge to keep her around.
_______________________________________________________
special woman." Usually when I hear this, I know they're headed
for trouble because they think if they meet "the one" their life is
going to somehow be complete.
What usually happens is, after a few months, she turns out to notbe all that special, and things get bad, really fast.
The last thing you ever want to do is link your life's fulfillment
to someone else. You want a woman who complements you, not
"completes" you. You are the only one who can "complete" you.
That, however, is no argument against meeting one woman for a
lifetime committed relationship. That's a fine thing, under the
right circumstances.
Most men, in view, have no idea what the right circumstances are
because they have little experience with women, good or bad. They
meet one, feel great, then believe the social conditioning that
says great feeling=committed for life relationship.
The divorce lawyers, obviously, love that kind of social
conditioning.
If, however, you make it you business to spend time with many women
(as friends, lovers, associates) then you begin to get a clearer
picture. You stop making decisions based on feelings (because you
experience where those lead) and start making decisions based on
reality.
You become comfortable around women, understanding why they do the
things they do, and learning how to deal with them in a way that's
no big deal to either of you.
You make yourself an attractive man to many women, making yourself
a more attractive man to just one. You know you can find another,
if things don't work out.
So, make it your business to associate with many women. In the
end, that will bring you to the one you really want, with theknowledge to keep her around.
_______________________________________________________
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